Truthfully, I am blessed

Remember this rather over used quote of "Time will heal the wounds."

Well, its not exactly true. Wait, it ain't true. What am I talking about! :/ What the bleah...   Time does not heal the wound, instead it just makes you forget about it. So when the memory returns, KABOOM! Yupyup, the hurt is like a knife that stab you in your heart. It is honestly only God and yourself whom can tend to the wound and heal it. I have realized that it needs oneself to heal. Why? You need to open up. So many times, I have just harden my heart, and make sure that emotions are an alien language to me. The results is that it ain't smart to do it. You can try lah, but the feeling of drilling a hole through that cement is excruciating! Once you have done so, only then can God work.

He respects our decision, is gives us the freedom of choice. Even when we choose the wide path, he really is that father standing there waiting, waiting with patience, in agony, in love, for the prodigal son to return home.

Then again, there is really those times he wrestle with you (perhaps only when you struggle against him), stepping in to set the records straight with things he ain't please with, chastening me. He demands us. He is a jealous God, something that I need to ingrain into this thick skull of mine, wanting the best from us and not the left-overs. Wanting to make us the best we can be, to maximize the potential in us. Frankly speaking, I am so stubborn, I have come to realize that I have never fully maximize the potential in me yet. This revelation might have come a bit to late, but there is no point looking back. Lot's wife did so, and she turned to stone. Alright that had no link, but just saying that looking back on what could have been will chain you up, so turn your head and look straight. If not, get one of these...

Haha!! Just joking yea.. Blogging this in a light-hearted manner ;)

So let get down to business. Lately, I am been trying to run away. But God speaks despite where you run to. The lyrics of "You Hold Me Now' by Hillsong... "No hiding.." is pretty true. Been youtubing a lot lately, and come across this MV.... A song from Twilight, not a fan but the song is nice, and I like the MV or just the candles.. Haha!!



God loved us from the start, even before I was born. He loved me perhaps even more than a thousand years , and he will love me more than a thousand years. So God beats Edward Cullen!! Wakaka!! Totally likeaboss. And for those who I have been chatting or asking for opinion what they deem love as, this song did trigger it slightly, a factor but not the main cause ;) Hehe!!

As for soccer. I know most of my JC friends don't know I own a blog. They just keep pestering to follow them on Twitter which ain't going to work. I am not going to let you flood my timeline!! But I really want to thank God, for blessing me with the talent to play soccer. Hope to create a video containing clips of my performance in A'div but honestly, my performance have been SHIT during the A'div. It has been horrible to be constantly asked why my performance has drop so drastically. That constant bombarding really hit me real hard. Confidence took a huge blow till near K.O sia! So when you watch it and believe I am "only' that good, I really ain't but it does not matter how people view me, so its up to you :)

Been greatly blessed with great friends. Well, my soccer teammates have been really fun to be with. I remember somewhere this time, I was screaming and shouting at some of them because they were really lousy and it was frustrating working with them. I still remember how my coach told me to relax and such.. Then came the MI tournament. The first test for some. And also the first medal for many of them!

I remember how good I felt then. I was buoyant, over the moon having been the guy who scored 7 out of 16 of JJC goals during the tournament. It was like a though I was scoring for fun. Got to admit, that set the standard for me. From then on, every time we played a friendly match in Nov, Dec and we seem out of ideas  in the attack. My coach will always say, pass the ball to me. I can "create something" which was true. My teacher said I was a match-winner. The image was set, people expected to deliver. And I usually did. Sometimes it wasn't enough like losing to SAJC despite scoring 2 goals and dribbling pass 13 people in the whole match, maybe it was more but it ain't important, we still lost. So I was praised quite a lot during this time and well, I was playing with a swagger.

Then came the injury. Actually, I was already feeling pain in my knees since May but wanted to get it checked only after the tournament and promos so that I could play and study without interruption. Was forced out of action for 6 weeks. And sad to say, I never regain that blistering pace, nor form that once people defined me with. I changed my boots during this time too. A boot that gave me more protection on my feet but also less accuracy. Why make that change? Well, to try and look after myself. I was trying to adapt to the team playing style then. Or they will trying to adapt to me. I wasn't used to the ball not being playing to me nor the plays not coming from me. And well, that lost of pace was costly, because I could not out-run people easily, but they could match my pace and it meant more adapting.

The KL trip was the next highlight. When the J1 came in..

Perhaps a bad choice for me personally... 

Why? Because this was the start of the worse injury ever obtained.. Or adding new types of injury into my already rather colourful resume. I remember blogging about me not wanting to go. And well, I think I shouldn't have. Unlike the last year trip where I could enjoy my bubble bath, or have one, crash at people's room and "party", I also didn't get injuried. Or I think I did not, maybe I did but it wasn't very serious.. :/

Alright, the trip was fun, just that the thought of taking your CTs after the trip wasn't very fun to think of. We needed to study during the trip and what lies! We never studied lah! LOL!! But I didn't get to bubble bath sia :( Nor enjoy reading a storybook. Instead, I was sleeping and playing away the trip which is the whole idea of a trip, right? Yup. So as far as I have written, it is fun and good. But The matches won't.. :( By now, you should probably tell that I am on the decline. Or my form is on the decline. But it probably wasn't very obvious but I was not a potent to opponent as much. However, I probably was still a threat to them and hopefully that theory explains why I was still being marked out, or kicked or injured by opponents. In the first match there, I was having a wrestling match. I blogged about this before and what came out of the match was just a very angry and injured me. I hurt my left shoulder in the match and until now I have a bone jutting out slightly.. I have not gone to see the doctor, and I do not think I would as long as I can play the piano and write.. :/ Then there was the kick at my heel that has cause my Achilles tendon to be injured or my Achilles heel to feel pain. I deem this the worse injury because I can't wear a guard to stop it from hurting nor removing pressure from it. This is because if I wear a guard my foot will hurt due to a ligament I tore in sec 1. So haizz. No way to feel less pain. But with A'div only a week away, I was never going to declare it and well, the injury has worsen rather badly.. Even walking is painful right now. Well, other injuries also give me the same type of problem but they do not that 2 years to heal!!!!!! Like What!!!??? Haizz..

The more injured you are, the harder it is to play better. Its true. I have been trying to hard to improve but I had to also make sure I do not worsen the injury or try not to. And that means you need to rest and not practice, nor train intensively like most will do nearing the season. :( Really sad.

So A'div anyone?? Haha!! Don't really want to blog about it. It was a roller coaster, from a high to a low, from hopeless to hopeful to heartbreak. JJC was just like Manchester united this season. Losing on goal difference, having a hand on the title (only for it slip away at the end). So just some pictures? I don't have any pics of me in action but I am hoping to do a video up.. Or upload some clips of me.. :/

Of course, I will be lying if I said I was satisfied with myself. I would have preferred to end on a high, and when I am at my best but it was not to be. But I got to say, I have be blessed. Thank guys for the memories. 

It has struck me how many of you played the supporting cast to me. When you passed me the ball and delivered nice balls to me to finish teams off. Something that I never really experience in Hong Kah. I have come to realise that perhaps I should have played a more supportive role when I had returned from injury but its to late to regret. Move on! Its the only way!! ;) Either way, Thank you!! :) 

P.s Unsure whether to talk about the A'div when I was J1. Because, that should have been the end. Its another long story on how I am playing again this season.....