When familiarity is found away from what I call home...
Every time I'm stuck in camp doing stuff that does not seem to have a purpose at all, but I do so just because I yearn to book out.. Because when I book out, I'm going home. Yet home has become a distant unfamiliar place. Every time I wanna book out because I wanna spend time with people that perhaps matter to me whether large or small, whether I know or don't, whether I admit or not but I can never hit the ground running. I'm lost...
Although, I'm only a few miles away from 'home'... Its an unfamiliar place. With all the constrain put upon me by army, I lack the capacity I once possessed. Its saddens me, no book out is perfect but I have yet to fully enjoy a book out. Its like there is no difference between being confined and booking out now.. Its just feels that way. If I'm confined, I'm stuck in Tekong, alone in my bunk with nothing to do for 9 hours while if I book out, people are either busy or if I meet them up, I feel that separation...
Honestly, BMT life has not been that cruel to me, or maybe it is, just that I'm thankful that it has not gone from bad to worse...
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